Monday, April 14, 2014

Snippets of a Story

Oh the noveling has taken over my life again. I have been dealing with a serious case of daydreaming all April. It got so bad while I was in Karate class and I was being trampled suddenly because I didn't hear our Hanshi say take five steps back. Not to mention I kicked my sister in the head and didn't even realize it. :-) So now you can see how distracting my novel has been. It is like living to lives. A difficult task indeed. But I thought I would share some very UNEDITED work with you guys. Unedited understand? I haven't even read over it again. I am linking up with Snippets of a Story.


Ok, so here is the snippet! Hope you enjoy it despite all my cheesiness! This is a snippet from my novel called First Impact. Read more about it here.


  “Will you be able to make it tonight?” Eric walked down the grocery aisle a basket hanging from his arm loaded already. “What? Jack, I need you.” He groaned and looked back down at his Mom's list. He nodded as he adjusted his cell phone, “Alright, alright, I get it.” He grabbed a box of cereal off the shelf and slipped it into the basket that was already over flowing. “Talk later.” he snapped the phone shut and let it drop into his pocket.

He let his head fall back and stared at the grocery store ceiling. He stomped his right foot to just get some anger out as he looked back down at his list. It seemed like everything was closing in today. After going to detention he got confronted by Jeremy again afterward and was rewarded by a punch in the stomach. Bailey had notified him she wasn't coming that night directly after as he was still recovering in his car. Warren had emailed him as he walked into the grocery store for his Mom to tell him he couldn't meet for their regular meeting the next week. And then Staples and Conan had to call and tell him they were not coming tonight either, this left Eric with Ellie only at the meeting.

Eric walked down the aisle and headed for the freezer section, “God, why? It's like he walls are closing in.” he mumbled as he scrapped his converse shoes across the floor. “Ellie? Really? Why couldn't I be told to love a different girl like a sister?”

He looked down the freezer aisle and stopped mid step. Alisha stood in the hall with her Mom. He spun around the corner and hid behind the boxes of cake mixes in front of him. Ever since their break up he didn't dare go near her. She was sure to give him a tongue lashing. And the last thing he needed was to get it from her and her mom. He had heard it all again and again. Religion is for the weak. You are a stupid fool. Your future is ruined. Church is a crutch for life. We had high hopes for you. Blah, blah, blah. He had heard it all. Eric peered around the corner, they still stood there discussing the flavor of frozen pizza to buy. At last they threw four pizzas in their cart and closed the freezer door. Alisha began pushing the cart his direction to leave the aisle. He panicked and bolted around the other aisle and ran down it.

He turned the corner sharply and collided with an old woman carrying a basket of groceries. They flew from her hands along with her cane as she cam to fall against the shelf of sauce jars.

“What on earth are you doing running in a store, young man?” the woman yelled, while waving her finger in his face.

He hurriedly picked up her cane and handed it to her while picking up her groceries. “It was an accident. I'm sorry. I won't be running next time don't worry.” he assured her.

The woman ripped her basket form his hands and slapped his leg with her cane. “Good then. We don't need someone worse off than me getting run over by a punk like you.” she walked off in a huff leaving Eric standing in the aisle.

He turned his head to see Alisha and her mother gawking at him from where they stood in the middle of the aisle. He was ready for the day to be over.

2 comments:

  1. Aw, poor Eric! I certainly have those days, too. I really enjoy the conversational tone of your writing. While reading your words, I became Eric. I identified with his clumsiness and my heart skipped a beat when he saw Alisha. Thanks for sharing these snippets! Keep writing! <3

    ReplyDelete

Thank you so much for sharing your thoughts!